Tricks
by perplexic
Summary: It was the kind of brutally ironic situation that made Kaoru think that maybe they were on to something with that whole karma thing. Sequel to Games. Same warnings apply.
1. Part I: Trauma

_Balanced._

Kaoru thought that that was a passable adjective to describe his present state of mind.

It was decidedly strange now, looking back on his own thoughts and actions, and trying to figure out _what in the name of god he was thinking_. There was just no… well… _balance_ to any of it. A maddening cycle of extremes that all revolved mercilessly around Hikaru.

He was unnaturally enamored with his twin brother. (That, balance or no, he was mildly sure would never change.) That was one side of the coin. A hopelessly smitten, loyal to a fault Kaoru who had the patience and understanding of a saint, and was self-sacrificing to the point of his own misery.

It was disgusting in a way, to be so spinelessly giving and submissive.

On the flip side of that coin however was a ruthless, sadistic Kaoru whose hatred consumed all other thoughts, who knew no forgiveness or mercy, only endless barrages of cruelty and cynicism.

It was equally disgusting to know he was capable of harboring such a thing.

However, with his newfound _balance_, he was left with a selectively loyal, for-the-most-part patient, moderately self-sacrificing, mildly sadistic, and slightly cynical Kaoru that was _still _unnaturally enamored with his twin brother.

Either way, there was no point in dwelling on it. He had made his bed as the saying went, and he would rather at least _try_ to sleep before tossing and turning all night, wondering how he could have done it better.

After all, they still hadn't talked about it.

_They were so close. The feeling of Hikaru's arms around his waist, the pleading look in Hikaru's eyes, the thrum of Hikaru's pulse under his fingertips, the bare ghost of Hikaru's breath on his lips—_

Neither he nor his brother seemed to be particularly eager to bring up the subject, and while nowhere near the sort of conflict that had transpired, there was a certain edge to their interaction now.

There was no shame or regret there, of that much he was sure, but a sort of nervous uncertainty, like what he imagined someone who had just lost their virginity felt like once everything was said and done.

Hikaru clung to his hand, joked plenty, smiled brightly, laughed easily, but never quite looked him in the eye, and had he been the type to bet, he would have wagered that he more or less did the same.

They _really_ needed to talk.

But 2:28 AM was not the time to do it.

Kaoru sighed quietly to himself and turned over to see Hikaru sleeping soundly, hand only just barely extended over where their beds where pushed together. He grasped his brother's hand gingerly, smiling to himself as Hikaru made a faint humming noise in his sleep.

_Maybe tomorrow._

-oOo-

It could have been any other morning.

The twin maids wake them promptly with a chorusing _Good morning Young Masters! _and proceed to lay out their uniforms and generally bother them until they are conscious enough to take care of themselves.

_I feel really groggy, shouldn't have stayed up so late._

After acknowledging each other sleepily they wash up and get dressed in silence, checking each other's appearances briefly before departing their room.

_Maybe I'll take a nap in math, Hikaru can fill me in later._

They are greeted at breakfast by their ever exuberant mother, who happens to be between business trips. They eat and chat with her about school and work and before long the harmonic voices of their maids inform them that it's time to go to school.

_Mom looked really happy._

They say goodbye to their mother in unison, picking up their bags from the butler at the door and climbed into their private car, joking about how they'll torment Tamaki that day.

_I'll talk to Hikaru tonight so we'll have the weekend to sort things out._

Hikaru lays a comforting hand on his shoulder and fusses that he looks tired and that maybe he should take a nap during Lit. class, and he would have made some sort of dry retort about Hikaru's awful Lit. grades if he wasn't distracted by the sudden movement of being pulled to his brother's chest and manhandled over to Hikaru's other side, as anything else he was about to say was lost in a discord of splintering glass and twisting metal as his senses abandoned him.

_What happened? Everything hurts… Hikaru… Hikaru…_

-oOo-

"HIKA—OW!!" Kaoru was struck by a searing pain in his neck and felt himself being urged back down, blinking dazedly at the nurses hovering over him.

"Hitachiin-san! Please calm down, you're injured!"

"I—? How—? What happened to my brother? Where's Hikaru!?"

"Hitachiin-san please! You've been in an accident!"

"An acci—? Oh _god_, please, I have to see Hikaru! Where—!?" Instead of the gentle pressing that he had been fighting thus far, he found himself firmly pushed down on to his back by a formidable figure.

"Calm down."

"Mo-Mori-senpai?" Hani quickly appeared over Mori's shoulder.

"Kao-chan! You've gotta settle down or you might hurt yourself!"

"But the accident—! Hikaru—!"

"Kaoru," Kyouya materialized behind the two nurses, who quickly backed out of his way. "You have two options at this point: You can either calm down, so we can inform you of the situation, or I can have the nurses bring a heavy sedative and you can speculate for yourself for a few hours." He adjusted his glasses briefly. "I have full confidence in that you'd prefer the former, but the decision is ultimately yours."

Kaoru grimaced, but quieted considerably.

"Good," Kyouya relaxed slightly, and closed his eyes to mentally call up all the facts. "Now as you know, you've been in an accident. The other vehicle was owned by an upper-class salary man, he was sleep deprived and was on his cell phone at the time. I'm sure you can put it together. The car impacted the side of the vehicle," Mori tightened his grip. "Hikaru took the brunt of the impact."

Kaoru jerked violently against Mori's hold, but he settled a bit when he felt Hani's hand on his urgingly.

"However seeing as the EMTs found him practically wrapped around you, I'm guessing it was his intention…" Kyouya opened his eyes to see Kaoru silently begging for him to just _get on with it_. He sighed and opened his notebook.

"Hikaru is suffering from moderate to severe traumatic brain injury which called for surgery to repair some minor contusions in the area of the temporal lobe. The surgery was a success but his intracranial pressure readings were abnormally high, so a ventriculostomy was also performed. The surgeon has informed me that physically he will most likely recover without permanent complications, but seeing as he has yet to wake up we are unaware of any cognitive impairment. He is in the intensive care unit at the moment …Ah, and he also has a broken arm."

"Umm… Kyou-chan…" Kyouya looked up at Hani, who was raising his hand like a student in school. "Can you maybe give Kao-chan the simplified version?"

Sure enough, when he looked back at Kaoru, he was squinting confusedly, but nodding as if he had absorbed even half of the words that had just come from Kyouya's mouth.

Kyouya sighed, but berated himself. Kaoru was just in an accident, of course he would be a little dazed.

"Hikaru injured his head very badly, yes?" Kaoru nodded slowly. "They needed to perform surgery to fix it." He grimaced a little but still nodded. "It worked, but because of swelling, they had to put in a tube to drain some fluid to relieve some pressure." The grimace worsened, but he still nodded. "He's still unconscious, but out of danger, though we still don't know if there will be any effects mentally. And I assume you got the broken arm part."

Kaoru seemed to deflate at the news that his brother was okay at the very least, having completely exhausted himself from panic.

"And since it probably never even crossed your mind to ask, you have a pretty nasty concussion and probably some mild whiplash, but assuming no severe complications you should be out by the end of the week at the vary latest."

"Oh… right, that's good to hear." Kaoru said, a bit embarrassed, but obviously still worrying about Hikaru.

"There's no need to worry about your brother Kaoru, this is one of my family's hospitals, and anything less then perfection will not be tolerated, I assure you."

Kaoru started to laugh, but stopped when pain jolted through is neck. "…Th-thank you, senpai."

There was a brief moment of silence as the injured boy looked around the room.

"Come to think of it, where are Haruhi and milord?"

"They're with your mother in the ICU. Would you object to me informing her that you're awake?"

"Oh, sure that's fine." He felt a little guilty. This was supposed to be her vacation.

"Alright, but in the mean time I'm afraid you'll need to cooperate with the nurses, understood?" Kaoru didn't miss the threatening undertone.

"Right."

He had just finished swallowing a painkiller for the ache in his neck when his mother barreled recklessly through the door, throwing herself on his lap.

"KAORU! MY BABY!! I'VE BEEN SO WORRIED!! I WAS SO HAPPY WHEN YOU TWO HAD FINALLY MADE UP, BUT THEN SOMETHING LIKE THIS—!!"

After shaking off his surprise, he tried to rub her back soothingly until her hysterics subsided. When she finally did sit up and look at him he almost gaped. Her make-up was an utter mess (with streaks of eyeliner on her cheeks and blotches of eye shadow smudged all around) and her hair and clothes completely disheveled (though not in the tastefully precise way he was used to).

He almost had trouble believing that this was the same lively but nonetheless composed woman that had been such a fleeting figure in his life. She looked eerily like a worried sick mother whose two precious children had just escaped death.

It was comforting in a way he couldn't quite understand.

"I'm sorry Kaoru… I just don't know what to do with myself… How do you feel?" She said after a while, still sniffling a bit.

"I've been better…" He said dismissively before taking on a grave tone. "How's Hikaru?"

His mother gripped his hand and stared into her lap. "He's still asleep… but they said probably soon!"

Kaoru forced a smile. "…I see."

After visiting for a while and assuring his mother at least ten times that he was not going to die suddenly if she left his side, she returned to the ICU with Hani and Mori.

The rest of the day seemed to pass in a blur. Haruhi and Tamaki came in to visit shortly after the others left and stayed with him while they took X-rays and MRIs to assure that there was no spinal cord or yet unnoticed brain damage. Between Tamaki's dramatic flare and Haruhi's straight-man attitude he found himself in slightly brighter spirits, but Kyouya noticed that he was getting tired and eventually sent them back to the ICU.

By the time the doctor arrived to inform them of the results, Kaoru had fallen asleep to the arrhythmic scratching of pen on paper.

-oOo-

Kaoru awoke to a similar arrhythmic sound as he had fallen asleep to, but tapping instead of scratching this time. He had to mentally restrain himself from trying turning his head to look towards the source of the sound.

"Kyouya? Has Hikaru—?"

The tapping paused for a moment. "Supposedly he's briefly opened his eyes a few times, but has yet to regain full consciousness."

"Oh… What time is it?"

"About 6 o'clock AM." Kaoru watched out of the corner of his eye as Kyouya set aside his laptop and stood up, walking over to Kaoru's bedside to push a button. A nurse knocked and entered shortly thereafter, busying herself by setting out some painkillers and water for him, as well as changing the bandage around his head that until this point he was unaware he had. Finally, after removing the contraption they had put on him that kept him from turning his head, she left with a polite bow and shut the door.

"The doctor came a while after you fell asleep," Kyouya started, causing Kaoru to flinch a little. He had forgotten he was there from all the nurse's fussing. "He said that they found no signs of detrimental damage in the scans, and that you are free to move around as you must. However, it would be best if you would rest as much as possible until you are discharged in two days. It would also be advisable for you to not turn your head excessively, because judging from the way you've been flinching, you probably do have some whiplash."

"Yeah, up and down seem alright, but whenever I try to turn my head it hurts like hell."

"Take the pills, they'll help."

"I didn't even notice the bandage, either."

"We'll seeing as you had a grade 5 concussion, I would be surprised if you _didn't_ need some form of bandage." Kyouya said sarcastically.

Kaoru was about to crack some kind of joke when the door slammed open.

"MOMMY!! DID YOU GET ANY SLE—Oh! Good Morning Kaoru! Are you feeling any better today?"

Kaoru flinched twice, once out of surprise and the other from the shooting pain he got when he turned his head by reflex.

"For god's sake Tamaki, this is a _hospital_, would you control your yourself?" Kyouya bit darkly.

"S-sorry Mommy! Hospitals always make me kind of edgy…" Tamaki started sheepishly, but quickly turned back to Kaoru. "So Kaoru! How are you feeling?"

"Fine I guess, my neck is killing me though… Has Hikaru—?"

The blond deflated at the older twin's name.

"They're saying it's just a matter of time, really…"

"…I see."

Tamaki rubbed at his neck awkwardly, but seemed to suddenly remember something and glanced around the room. Upon spotting Kyouya glaring irritably at his computer, he promptly relieved him of it. "Ah Kyouya! Come to think of it I need to speak with you private—EEP!"

Kyouya had stood suddenly, leveling a particularly blood-thirsty stare at the Host Club's King.

Throwing all self-preservation instincts to the wind, he quickly ushered Kyouya out of the room before any blood was shed (at least in front of Kaoru).

Recalling his sempai's instructions, Kaoru obediently swallowed the aforementioned pills and laid back to rest.

_The Low Blood Pressure Evil Lord is fearsome as always._

-oOo-

"Tamaki, if you don't return my computer _right now—_"

"I know, I know, mysterious tragedies, inexplicable misfortune, gruesome death, etc., etc." The blond replied dismissively, returning the computer but persisting in leading Kyouya to some undisclosed location.

"Tamaki, where are you taking me?"

"To sleep."

"_What_?"

"_Sleep_." Tamaki repeated blandly. "Don't even pretend that you didn't pull an all-nighter Kyouya. I knew you would regardless of whether or not anyone else was there, so I had the rest of us take turns resting, but now that the other's can watch Kaoru, you need sleep! Heck I probably fell asleep more than anyone else and I'm still tired! Oh! Do you want some company Kyouya? Could I sleep with you?"

The nurse that just happened to be passing by that second shot them a suspicious look, but, in the fashion of a true professional, made no comment.

"Tamaki, don't phrase things so ambiguously, _please_."

"Ambiguously? What do you mean?"

"Nevermind. I know better than to try arguing with you, but two hours _maximum_. I have an analysis that needs to be done by next—"

"Yes, yes, I'm sure. Now sleep!"

Without warning Tamaki pushed him into one of the plusher, more private, rooms of the hospital and shut the door firmly in his face.

_Note to Self: Kill Tamaki at next convenient opportunity._

-oOo-

AN: Yes, ladies and gentlemen (or maybe just ladies), I have created a sequal to my abomination, _Games_, at xoxoxlovestinksxoxox's request. I decided to actually do author's notes this time around so I can apologize profusely for being such a slow-as-hell writer, since I'm posting as I go this time around.

This will be another (pseudo)psychologically based one, but I'll leave how a secret for now. You can consider this an apology for how horrificly abrupt the ending to _Games_ was. (Maybe I've been reading too much Neal Stephenson. / )

As a forewarning, I have no idea where this is going, but let's hope it's interesting, eh? Also beware of sporadic updates, possibly months, I really can't be sure at this point. This is also unbeta-ed so please excuse my fail writing skills.

Hope you enjoyed the first chapter! (Even though I made the twins get into a car accident. I still haven't forgiven myself for that, but it's necessary. And no one's going to die ...I think. D: )


	2. Part II: Delusion

"KAO-CHAN! KAO-CHAN!!"

If he hadn't been so preoccupied with nearly jumping out of his skin, Kaoru might have wondered how many times he was going to exacerbate his whiplash from people not knowing how to knock. But as it stood he was more focused on biting back some colorful terminology that had been inspired by the dulled, but still considerable, shooting pain in his neck.

"H-Hani-sempai, please don't startle me like that…"

"But Hika-chan—!" Before he could even finish his sentence, Kaoru was up and heading out the door, despite the aching protest of just about every muscle in his body, and straight into Mori.

"Mori-senpai! The doctor's said that I'm fine! I can walk if I need to so please—!"

Mori only blinked slowly and pointed behind him.

"Other way."

"Oh…"

"Geez, Kao-chan! Don't run off like that!" Hani whined, grabbing Kaoru's hand and leading him to the elevator. "You don't even know where Hika-chan's room is!"

Kaoru bit his lip nervously and tried to focus on the steady beeping of the elevator as opposed to the subtle swimming of his vision.

"I'm sorry senpai, but really can't expect me to be calm about this! Hikaru was injured! And as much as I appreciate you guy's telling me things, it's just not the same! I just—!"

The cheerful ping of the elevator cut him off, and as soon as the doors opened they were greeted by the faint panicky tones of a familiar voice.

"I just need to see him with my own eyes to make sure he's okay, alright?!"

Kaoru could have cried at the sound of it. Without thinking he pulled his arm from Hani's grip and sped off towards the voices before the elevator had even finished opening.

"I know Hikaru, but—"

"So then why won't you let me up!?"

"You're hooked up to at least three machines and on more drugs than I can remember. You'd kill yourself just trying to stand! Plus, Hani-sempai and Mori-sempai already—"

"HIKARU!"

Kaoru skidded into the room, pushing not quite gently past Haruhi, who had been trying to confine Hikaru to his bed, and grabbing almost desperately for his brother's right hand, which seemed to be the only thing unhindered by tubes or bandages.

Hikaru looked terrible. His complexion was pale and sickly, his hands were cold, and he could just barely see the beginnings of where they had shaved off part of the hair on the back of his neck to do the operation. But he had expected that for the most part, and it would have been alright if Hikaru hadn't been looking at him with such a horrified expression.

"Hikaru? What's the matter? Are you in pain? Do you need—?" That was when he remembered the bandage he had. "Oh, are you worried about this?" He asked pointing to it. "It's nothing compared to what you have, I'm fine really!"

Hikaru blinked and seemed to regain himself, looking out the window nervously.

"I see, thank goodness…" He said, collapsing back stiffly.

"Hikaru, why—?" Kaoru started.

"Say Haruhi, could I talk with Kaoru privately for a second?" He said suddenly, cutting him off. "Please?"

Haruhi looked wary, but nodded. "Alright."

She cast one final glance back at them as the door shut with a resounding thud.

"What did I do wrong this time?" Hikaru said tensely, still looking away from Kaoru. "Is it from the head injury? Or was it stress?"

"What are you—?"

Hikaru's hand shot out suddenly, dragging Kaoru down by the collar so they were eye to eye.

"Don't _fuck_ with me Id." He almost growled, making an obvious effort to keep his voice down.

"Id!?" Kaoru repeated disbelievingly. "Hikaru, I'm not—!"

"Bullshit! Was I just wrong or what? I fixed everything, so why!? Why are you still here?" He murmured angrily.

Kaoru started to try to reason with him, but was stopped short when Hikaru's hand slid around his neck and pulled him into a kiss.

He went rigid, a mixture of shock and déjà vu overwhelming any response. While Kaoru was still stunned, Hikaru separated from him just enough to look into his eyes.

_Suffocating_. Was the first coherent thought that Kaoru was able to grasp. _Like he's trying to look into my soul or something. _

"It didn't work?" Hikaru said with quiet disbelief and no small amount of panic.

"Hikaru—"

"HIKARU! THANK GOD YOU'RE AWAKE!!" Their mother near screamed, pushing not quite gently past Kaoru, who was suddenly tempted to apologize to Haruhi, and proceeded to smother his twin in motherly worry.

Despite the fact that he had just been accused of being what essentially amounted to his evil alter-ego, and knocked over in his mother's panic, he was sorely tempted to laugh at the stifled grimace on his brother's face.

"Careful now honey or you might put Kaoru in the ICU next." Came an unassuming voice from behind him.

Kaoru startled only a little, before looking up to see a handsomely unspectacular face grinning down pleasantly at him. "Dad? You got back from your business trip?"

His father sighed good humouredly. "No, I've been here the whole time I'm afraid. I was in the room when you woke up as a matter of fact."

A pang of guilt struck him. "Geez Dad, why didn't you say anything?"

"Sorry, I was more concerned with alerting your mother to your consciousness at the time." He said apologetically, helping Kaoru to his feet again.

His mother finally detached enough from Hikaru to take note of the other occupants of the room. "Oh Kaoru dear, I should have known you'd be here. I'm sorry, are you alright? I just—!"

"I'm fine mom really, I know how worried you've been."

"Are you sure, you look a little shaken…"

"Mom's right Kaoru, I think you should go back and rest now." Hikaru said smiling stiffly, speaking up for the first time since they were interrupted.

Both their parent's looked at Hikaru apprehensively.

"But—!" Kaoru started.

"Come on Kaoru, if even your brother says so, you must be tired." His father said firmly, leading him out the door with an urging hand on his back.

"But Dad—!" Kaoru argued once they had left Hikaru's room.

"Kaoru, I know this must be hard on you, probably even more than you realize, seeing your brother like that. Stress like that can get to you rather easily, so take some time to gather yourself, okay? Hikaru is going to be fine now."

Kaoru grit his teeth and nodded, following his father into the elevator. How could he even begin to explain this?

_Oh no father dear, the thing is, I'm worried about Hikaru because he seems to have it in his head that I'm actually one of my long dead split personalities that was adamant on making him miserable. The same one that made us fight for a few days and then almost make out. You know, the one you and Mom were never told about!_

By the time they had gotten back into his room, he had finished mentally berating himself and laid down silently in his bed, mind glazing over the kiss on the head and the quiet _Good Night_ from his father before he left him to rest.

Once the sturdy tapping of his father's footsteps had faded, Kaoru sat up and hugged his knees to his chest, wondering if this was some kind of divine retribution for never owning up to any of his problems in the hopes that Hikaru would make them all better for him.

A light knock came from the door and Kaoru was almost as surprised by the sound as he was by the fact that whoever it was bothered to _knock_.

"Sorry to bother you Kaoru." Came the cool, collected voice from the door.

"Ah, Kyouya-senpai… That would explain it." Kaoru said only slightly bitterly.

Kyouya hummed in a way that may or may not have been amused and continued.

"I figured you wouldn't mind if I gave you a quick update on Hikaru's condition."

Kaoru was proud of himself for not hesitating for more than half a second. "…I know he's awake."

"I expected as much. However, I merely wished to inform you that they've removed the tube from the ventriculostomy and have deemed him free of any serious complications, but wish to keep him here for a few more days as a precaution."

"That's great to hear."

Kyouya eyed him levelly. "Needless to say, if you notice anything peculiar, physically or otherwise, please do inform us."

He couldn't hold back the guilty flinch. "…Naturally."

"Kaoru—"

"Thank you for informing me senpai. I'm probably going to get some rest now. Good night." Kaoru interrupted, rolling over onto his side, effectively bringing the conversation to a close.

"…Good night." Kyouya resigned, closing the door to leave Kaoru to his silence.

-oOo-

"Ah Kyouya! There you are! How's—?"

"Something's wrong." Kyouya interjected, cutting Tamaki off.

The blonde's hand on his shoulder brought his insistent stride to a halt, turning to see what was probably the most serious face Tamaki had made all day.

"Of course there's something wrong Mommy, our sons are in the hospital."

Yet another unfortunate nurse happened to be walking past them at that instant and visibly choked, dropping her clipboard noisily before gathering it and trying to walk off unaffectedly.

_She must be new. _Kyouya thought bitterly. "Tamaki, what did I tell you about …nevermind."

Tamaki pouted. "What did you tell me?"

The Shadow King ignored the question deliberately. "Kaoru was acting very strangely when I went to tell him about Hikaru."

Tamaki's childish disposition evaporated. "Very strangely as in…?"

"He flinched when I mentioned that he should tell us if anything seemed off with Hikaru primarily, but there were other signs everywhere."

"So you think that maybe Kaoru's noticed something and is trying to hide it."

"Precisely."

"But why would Kaoru want to hide something like that?" Tamaki said gravely.

"That's what I intend to find out."

-oOo-

Kaoru slept terribly. There was nothing but silence and it drove him mad. He needed something, anything to wash away his thoughts and worries. Shock, exhaustion, and the scratching of Kyouya's pen had been enough before, but somehow the combination of the glaring silence and the knowledge that Hikaru was not close enough that he could hear his breathing was more disturbing than any monsters under the bed could ever hope to be. Still he managed to snatch a few hours of sleep between urges to go sneak up to his brother's room.

In the middle of one of his brief dozes, the sound of the door opening and the squeaking of a cart's wheels leaked into his awareness.

"Kaoru… are you awake?" He heard Haruhi's voice. "I brought some breakfast for you…"

"Haruhi…?" Kaoru said, sitting up and rubbing at his eyes. "What are you doing here?"

Haruhi blinked at him. "Did you not want me here?"

"No! No, not at all! I just… Hikaru likes you best after all, so I figured…"

"Second best." She corrected flatly.

"…Right… second best, but—"

"Kaoru what's wrong?"

He paused a moment, taken aback by the sudden question. "Well, I'm in the hospital, have a nasty case of whiplash, my twin brother almost died—"

"Kaoru, stop running away from this, what's wrong with Hikaru?" Haruhi said impatiently. "This is _serious_, Hikaru might be in trouble and we _need_ to know."

Kaoru picked at the food in front of him. He had been expecting this. But the matter of his issues was not something he was eager to share. If they pinned him as a basket case then there would be drama and therapy and all sorts of things he had no need of anymore. Considering Id's nature they might even try to separate him from Hikaru, and the thought was utterly unbearable. They'd never look at him the same way.

"Kyouya-senpai sent you here, didn't he?" He said finally.

Haruhi frowned. "He did, but I would have noticed anyways. You're rather easy to read when it comes to certain things."

"Like Hikaru, right?" He supplied wryly.

Haruhi nodded silently.

"Thank you for worrying for Hikaru, but I don't think I should be the one you should be asking. If something's wrong with his body then all the fancy machines would tell us, right?"

"So it's a mental issue then?" Kyouya said tentatively, opening the door to reveal himself and Tamaki.

"Ah Milord, Kyouya-senpai, I was wondering if you'd be eavesdropping."

"Don't change the subject." Kyouya said harshly, closing the door behind them.

"Kaoru, you don't need to hide things from us." Tamaki said trying to balance out the edge to Kyouya's voice.

"What is this? Some kind of 'Good Cop, Bad Cop' routine?" Kaoru said evasively.

Kyouya crossed his arms, clearly unimpressed. "So we've established that mentally, at least, there is something wrong with Hikaru."

"I never said that." Kaoru snapped.

"No, but I have reasons to suspect aside from your unspoken implications."

"Like what?!"

Kyouya's eyes narrowed. "I was trying to avoid bringing it up, but if you must know, I got a call from Hikaru a week or so ago concerning yourself and mental instability."

Kaoru blanched and Haruhi's eyes widened.

"Putting aside any possible issues of your own for the moment, considering the fact that that mental instability was caused by premature birth, Hikaru was most likely effected as well. Combine that with the fact that he sustained a head injury severe enough to merit surgery and it's not ridiculous to consider the possibility of some form of mental illness."

Kaoru clenched the sheets of his bed, murmuring something under his breath.

"Kaoru…" Haruhi started hesitantly. "…a week ago… that fight—"

"I SAID SHUT UP!" He snapped fiercely. He was getting panicky and he could almost feel it happening, like oil collecting over water. Something dark and bitter and lusting for misery.

"What happened is none of you're business! None of this is, so just LET IT GO!"

It was Tamaki who finally broke the tension, stepping forward with a strange aura of wisdom that he hadn't seen since middle school. He took Kaoru's face into his hands, forcing him to look his way.

"Kaoru, you have do this for yourself, no one else can save you." He said sternly. "Hikaru's not here to protect you from this and play the bad guy for you. Nothing's going to get better if you don't _do_ anything to fix it."

Kaoru gritted his teeth and hissed. "That's always the problem, isn't it?"

"Tamaki-senpai, wait." Haruhi said suddenly, urging the blond into letting go of Kaoru. "This… this isn't about Hikaru at all, is it?"

Kaoru stared blankly.

"You're afraid… aren't you?" Haruhi said slowly, putting it together as she went. "You're afraid… of us and what will happen if you open up to us, right?"

"What… Haruhi, what are you talking about? Why would I—? That's _not_ it!"

Haruhi set her hand over his gently. "Kaoru… I think I can safely speak for us all when I say that we've already accepted you, both of you, whatever and whoever you are. Saying it or putting a name on you're faults won't change that."

The silence that followed was oppressive.

Kaoru finally broke the quiet with a disturbing lilt to his laugh as he buried his head in his hands.

"_Cheater_." Kaoru said finally.

"What?"

"You're _cheating_ Haruhi, saying something like that." He elaborated wryly, scrubbing at his eyes furtively.

"Kaoru… are you crying?" She asked finally.

"No no Haruhi, there's just something in my eye. It'd be an insult to my manly pride otherwise." He said with a strange mix of emptiness and mirth. "That's incredibly touching, _really_, I just… I can't."

"Kaoru," Kyouya interrupted. "Would I be correct in assuming that the only reason you refuse to talk about Hikaru is because his problem is directly related to yours?" Kaoru didn't nod, but didn't correct him either. "So then if I reveal you're problem, then you'll have no reason to hold back any more correct?"

Kaoru's head shot up. "How!?"

"The call." He said simply.

The younger twin looked betrayed. "Hi-Hikaru _told_ you?"

"Perhaps."

Kaoru went silent.

"If you'd like we can discuss this in private."

Kaoru gripped at his sheets miserably, weighing his options, all the while looking like a small cornered animal.

"No…" He said finally. "It's not fair to keep them in the dark like this…" He looked over at Kyouya in defeat. "I'm surprised you know, you really don't seem bothered."

Kyouya huffed slightly. "Considering you and Hikaru's behavior when I first met you, it was one of many suspicions I had to be frank. That aside…" He paused hesitantly, eyes hidden by the glare on his glasses. "…Haruhi has a way of being uncannily accurate at times, don't you think?"

"Why Kyouya-senpai, was that and actual _compliment_ or am I hearing things?" Haruhi said dryly.

"I'm merely stating facts."

Kaoru laughed half genuinely. "I can't believe you guys, making jokes at a time like this. I'm trying to have a crisis here."

"You don't have to tell me you know." Haruhi said suddenly. "If you're not comfortable saying it."

"No… I need to get over this." He looked up at Tamaki. "Considering that Kyouya-senpai knows, you probably know too, right?"

Tamaki shook his head. "I'm unaware of the nature of the problem actually, Kyouya only told me that there was a possibility of one."

Kaoru took a deep breath. "Have you ever heard of Dissociative Identity Disorder?"

Haruhi shook her head.

"It's what you call it when you develop multiple personalities."

She blinked at him for a moment. "So then you…"

He nodded.

"I see… Then the fight a week ago—!"

He nodded again. "I don't know how much Hikaru told you senpai, but… he… the other personality… he referred to himself as Id."

Kyouya nodded plainly, giving no hint to how much he knew.

Haruhi spoke up. "So then, your other personality, Id, doesn't get along well with Hikaru?"

Kaoru nodded, grimacing. "His only concern in life was making Hikaru as miserable as possible."

"Then… what about now?" She said hesitantly.

"He's gone now… I guess you could say I don't need him anymore."

Haruhi nodded. "I think that's enough, Kaoru. It's a rather personal matter I'm sure. I'm glad you're alright now in any case."

Kaoru smiled weakly. "Thank you, but it's alright if you ever feel the need to ask."

"So then," Kyouya spoke up. "How does this pertain to Hikaru's condition?"

Kaoru frowned. "Well… to put it very simply, Hikaru is convinced that I'm Id."

"I thought you said he was gone?" Haruhi interjected.

"He is, but once we made up, I just… I didn't have the heart to bring it up again. It's a bit of a sore subject between us."

"I see… Then, couldn't you just tell him that Id is gone?" She suggested helpfully.

"Hikaru would probably think Id was trying to trick him or something. I tried to tell him that I wasn't Id and he yelled at me to stop messing with him." Kaoru said darkly.

"Wait… so then when he was acting strangely when you went to visit. He was trying to hide it too?"

"Probably. Like I said, it's not exactly a pleasant subject, or one that he'd want to advertise. It's always just been strictly between us."

"That's not healthy Kaoru, you should have talked to someone."

No one missed the look of worry that flashed over his face. "It doesn't matter now, okay? He's gone now, I'll swallow a thousand needles and all that."

"How can you tell?"

"I dunno… I just feel more… _balanced…_ I guess."

"I see."

Kaoru sighed. "It really shouldn't really surprise me by now, but you're not terribly delicate about these things, you know that Haruhi?"

Haruhi blinked curiously. "Oh really? Sorry… Though I hardly think you're one to talk."

"Maybe." Kaoru said, laughing lightly. "…thank you though, Haruhi. Really."

"Don't worry about it." She said smiling.

"I think this is sufficient for now." Kyouya said moving for the door. "Thank you for your cooperation Kaoru, no matter how reluctant it was."

Kaoru sat up suddenly. "Senpai, I have one request."

Kyouya looked back at him silently.

"Please don't confront Hikaru about this… or tell the doctors… not yet at least. I want to try to convince him. Milord was right…" He looked over at Tamaki, who nodded proudly. "I need to try."

Kyouya merely smiled and continued out the door, Tamaki following shortly thereafter.

"Say, Haruhi, would you do me a favor?"

Haruhi looked at him curiously. "Sure."

"You have a book or something right?"

Not soon after, Kaoru fell into a restful sleep, listening to the turning of pages and a rhythmic breathing that wasn't quite his brother's, but was somehow a little soothing nonetheless.

-oOo-

**AN:** Salutations once again from my small corner of the universe, and as always, I'm sorry for being so horrifyingly slow. A big shout out to any one who reviewed, favorited, etc. _anything_ of mine, be it this story or the others. I'm terribly confused by it all, really. I can't thank you enough.

Anyways, hopefully more of Hikaru next chapter, and once again I warn you that this story is totally kicking my ass right now, but I'll do my best. Hope you enjoyed!


	3. Part III: Psychosis

By the time Tamaki had caught up with him, Kyouya was already getting in the elevator, about to push the button for the doctor's level.

He reached out and grabbed his hand. "Kyouya, you said you wouldn't."

"Actually, I didn't." He said flatly as the doors slid shut and the elevator started moving.

"_Kyouya!_ Just give him a chance! What could the doctor really do, anyways?"

Kyouya glared sharply at him. "You find our staff lacking?"

Tamaki did his best to glare back. "Th-That's not what this is about and you know it."

"While the delusion in itself isn't detrimental to his health, it could be a symptom of a larger problem."

Tamaki grabbed Kyouya's shoulders and leaned forward, trying to press his point. "I _know_ that, but just give Kaoru a little time to try! It's bad enough that we bullied him into talking about something personal like that!" He paused, thinking for a moment. "Plus, if there was a larger problem surely your family's doctors would have noticed by now." Tamaki added smugly.

Kyouya scoffed at the trick statement. "If I didn't know any better, I might be tempted to say I'm rubbing off on you."

The elevator pinged loudly as the doors opened, revealing a nurse pushing an elderly lady in a wheel chair. There was an awkward pause as all parties involved took in the situation, with Kyouya backed against the wall of the elevator, Tamaki entirely too close and looming over him slightly, the nurse blinking, entirely unsure how to react, and the elderly lady having the decency to look vaguely appalled.

The moment passed and the doors began closing, letting through a _Kids these days._ _Honestly. _before shutting completely.

Tamaki tilted his head curiously. "I wonder why they didn't get in?"

Kyouya shoved him away firmly, pushing the button while Tamaki was distracted.

"Ow! Mommy! Why did you push me!?

"I swear to god, you have to be timing these things."

"What things?"

"…nevermind."

"Mommy! Why do you keep saying that!? And don't pretend like you didn't just press that button!"

Kyouya sighed. "You do realize that both the Doctor and Hikaru's rooms are on the same floor, right?"

Tamaki froze, turning to hide his embarrassment. "…O-Of course! I just wanted to make sure…"

"Of course you did."

-oOo-

He couldn't understand it. Or maybe he could and he just couldn't accept it. Or maybe it was because he was high as a kite from all the painkillers they had him on and he could hardly even remember that two and two equaled five. But that wasn't important right now. What was important was that Id had completely taken over his brother.

He couldn't understand it. Or maybe he could and he just couldn't accept it. Or maybe it was because he was so out of it he was thinking in circles and never actually thinking about it. But that wasn't important. What was important was Kaoru. That much he could manage, because even if the world imploded, the fabric of space and time warped, Tamaki finally grew a brain, or any other inconceivable event occurred, Kaoru would always be important.

But Kaoru wasn't there anymore. Only Id was there.

He didn't know when the line between Kaoru and Id had gotten so blatant, but it had, because no matter how he looked at it, that hadn't been his brother. It just wasn't. It looked liked him, sure. But it just wasn't. It was Id. That was the only other option.

He couldn't understand it. Or maybe he could and he just couldn't accept it. Or maybe he just really needed to get off these damn drugs so he could think straight for more than thirty seconds.

Because no matter how much it seemed like there was nothing left of Kaoru in that body, there had to be some way to get him back. There just had to be because he refused to believe that it could be any other way. The very idea that the only remnants of his brother were hatred and malice was terrifying in a way he couldn't describe. He knew he was still Kaoru, still his brother, but he couldn't help but seclude himself in the hopes of evading whatever sadistic plans he knew were coming.

Because Id _was_ plotting something no doubt, as he would stop at nothing to see him miserable. Id was a vengeful bastard like that and obviously hadn't seen enough of his misery to placate whatever self-righteous notion of justice he believed in. Hence why he had seen fit to take Kaoru away. Again.

He couldn't understand it. Or maybe he could and he just couldn't accept it. Or maybe he needed to murder whoever the bastard was that invented painkillers because _damn it_ he couldn't focus and he was a failure as a brother for letting this happen and he needed Kaoru more than anything right now and… and…

He couldn't understand it.

"Hikaru, are you awake?" He heard vaguely.

"Ngh." was the most intelligent answer he could give. But he managed to look in the general direction of the door to see Kyouya and Tamaki coming in before closing his eyes again. "Fucking drugs."

"…I'll suggest for the doctor to revise the dosage." He heard a quick scratching sound.

"How are you feeling? Notice anything odd?" Tamaki said nervously. Hikaru heard something that sounded vaguely like someone being elbowed in the stomach.

"High." He said flatly. "That's kind of overriding everything else at the moment."

"I see. The doctor advised us to beware of any cognitive issues, so inform a nurse if you feel that anything, no matter how seemingly unrelated, seems off to you." Kyouya said rather impersonally.

"Ngh."

He heard someone sigh.

"Well then, we'll leave you to rest!" Tamaki said with forced energy. "And don't hesitate to ask for our support!"

He opened his eyes again to see the two leaving.

"Wait…" He said weakly.

They turned to look at him.

"…Is…Does Kaoru seem to be doing alright?"

He was surprised that Kyouya was the one to answer.

"If I might be so bold as to say, I think he misses his brother."

Hikaru turned his head forlornly, closing his eyes once again as he heard the door close.

"So do I."

-oOo-

He opened his eyes slowly, taking in the empty room. Haruhi had left at some point while he had been asleep, leaving a note saying that she had gone to get food and check on Hikaru.

_Hikaru…_

He bit back a sob, the misery of separation overwhelming him and eating away at his very being. It was like a tangible weight that pulled at his heart and soul, crushing his will to persevere. He gazed forlornly at the descending sun, bleeding out into the pristine blue sky and leaving the cold lifeless night behind.

"Don't feel lonely sky, my light has left me too. Perhaps we are both doomed to loose ourselves in this darkness?" He said quietly. "Yes, maybe that's been my fate from the start. I was never worthy of walking aside my light to begin with... harboring such shameful desires and selfishly clinging to his affection."

He couldn't help the tears that spilled, curling into himself and choking down the sobs.

"I can't do this… I can't… I can't take this… it hurts so much… and… and…. AND THAT'S ENOUGH! FUCK I CAN'T TAKE THIS!!" He yelled suddenly, slamming his fist into the bedside table.

He stood abruptly, walking over to the sink and washing his face. "Tch. Nothing's ever going to get done at this rate! I have to do _everything_ myself, don't I?"

"Were you saying something Kaoru?" Haruhi's voice came from the door.

"Oh Haruhi! You're back? How was lunch?" He said with convincing cheerfulness.

"I'm surprised you didn't ask how Hikaru is doing." She said walking over towards him.

His eye twitched only slightly. "Well, it hasn't been that long… and the doctors already said he's going to be alright…"

Haruhi eyed him carefully. "Kaoru… are you feeling okay?"

"As good as can be expected." He said sarcastically.

"…Are you sure?"

"Haruhi," He said with only the slightest edge. "I said I'm fine."

"It's just… you're acting kind of irritable. Almost like Hika-"

Before she knew it, her back was against the wall and his hand was poised at her throat, tensed with malicious intent.

"Say it." He said gravely. "I dare you. _Say it._"

"Kaoru…what…?"

"God how I'd love to tear up that prettily oblivious face of yours! You don't even have the slightest clue as to your part in this! Oh how I'd love to crush your lovely neck and watch you choke on your own mortality. And now _this_." He said seethingly, smiling all the while.

A look of realization crossed her face. "…Id…?"

He pulled back, blinking blankly before grinning again. "Well what do you know, there are people with an IQ slightly larger than their age! Tell me was it the attitude or the death threats that gave me away? …On second thought, don't even answer that. I don't care about you."

Haruhi didn't flinch at his slander. "You know I can't very well just let you leave."

"Of course not, we've got to have our fearless heroine save the day, right?" He laughed heartily. "Get a grip kid, you can't stop me."

Haruhi frowned. "You're right, maybe _I _can't, but…" Making a quick duck out of Id's reach, she dashed toward the bed and hitting the button to call the nurse's station. Realizing her intent, Id swore under his breath, barely managing to catch her and cover her mouth before the nurse's brightly impersonal voice chimed in.

"Good Evening Hitachiin-san, is there something I can get for you?"

Haruhi tugged and bit his hand, but he remained unaffected.

"Ah! No, I'm quite alright. I accidentally hit the button with my elbow." He said innocently.

"I see. However should you need anything, please don't hesitate to call!" She said cheerfully detached. The speaker clicked and the line cut off.

"Goodness me, it seems like I've got a crafty little bugger here." He said menacingly. "Well, that's not too hard to resolve."

Dragging her over to the closet, he shoved her inside, jamming the door shut with a nearby chair.

"Sorry love, but entertaining as you are, I've got bigger cockroaches to kill. All offense meant." He taunted, grinning to himself as he heard the faint sound of her yelling at him and struggling against the door.

_How amusing, really. Who would have known that other people were so fun to mess with? If I could make a quick detour on the way… Maybe this troublesome plan might end up interesting after all. And seeing as I'm being good and getting that guy there without hours of angsting in between, I think I can rightfully have a few minutes of fun._

Id sighed wryly.

_Really, what kind of lame brained plan is this anyways? Something this deluded was better off staying in dreamland… _

-oOo-

Kaoru was dreaming. He had to be, because a dream was the only place that you could look in a mirror and not see your reflection. Plus his dreams always had a way of being nicely symbolic like that.

He sighed helplessly, running his fingers over the cool surface of the glass where his mirror image should have been.

"Because right now, I'm without my reflection, right?"

"You're a sap of the highest order, I swear."

Kaoru looked to his left, seeing the spitting image of himself with a cocky grin on his face.

"…Id." He said quietly, making no attempt to veil the contempt in his voice.

"Naturally."

"…This is-"

"-all my fault?" He interjected snidely. "Don't lie to yourself."

"No, this is just a dream, is what I was going for, because no matter how poetic it would be, talking to a split personality should be impossible. And I'm well aware of my faults thank you very much."

"You sure about that?"

"Not really."

Id stared at him unwaveringly. "So?"

"So…what?"

Id shot him a disbelieving look. "Tch. Don't turn into your brother on me here. I had better expectations of you than that."

Kaoru thought for a moment. "You want to know what I'm going to do about this."

"Good boy. And…?"

"…I'm working on it."

Id shook his head in exasperation. "Tch. Fine, I'll help you sort it out a bit. For starters, what's the issue at hand?"

Kaoru regarded him warily, but answered. "Hikaru thinks that you've taken over again."

"Indeed. And why do think that is?"

"Probably an effect of the accident."

"Which would make it…?"

"Some form of mental illness or delusion."

"Which means you can…"

Kaoru said nothing, at a loss.

Id leaned over to whisper something in his ear.

"IT MEANS YOU CAN DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!" He yelled harshly, laughing as Kaoru flinched away from him. "Did you seriously think I'd help you? I'm the evil alter-ego, remember?"

"Asshole." Kaoru growled, covering the offended ear.

"Listen here genius, that retard brother of yours is delusional, there's no doubt about that. If I were in control I would have tricked him into overdosing himself or pushed him down a flight of stairs by now. But he's so screwed in the head that the only way to convince him that you're _not_ me would probably be to act like my complete opposite. And face it, I'm _part of you_. No matter what you do, there will always be some of me in there. It's inescapable!"

Kaoru gritted his teeth, frowning. "Is that all you're here to say? This it's a hopeless situation?"

"More or less."

"Fuck off."

"My, my, no need to get so testy, _Ka-o-ru_." He said mockingly, stepping between Kaoru and the mirror. "Or else you might _really_ turn into me."

He was just moments away from completely exploding at Id when he noticed that behind him, there was a reflection in the mirror.

"You have a reflection…"

_Id's reflection…!_

Going around Id, he reached into the mirror and grabbed his reflections arm, feeling the layers of the dream peeling away, and his thoughts dividing.

-oOo-

Id shivered as he remembered the sensation of the separation of thoughts and quickly rapped on the looming wooden door. The dimwitted woman at the nurse's station was charmed with him enough to direct him towards Kyouya and Tamaki's current location, a plush office available for high-class businessmen to use when visiting the sickly.

A faint _come in_ was heard and he turned the polished gold handle, greeted by the site of Tamaki dead asleep, slouched over a rather thick book, and Kyouya typing away steadily at his laptop.

"What are you doing out of bed Kaoru? Where's Haruhi?" Kyouya said monotonously.

"I was getting kind of stiff from lying around so much, so I thought I'd see what the two of you were up to." Id said with forced geniality, grateful that Kyouya was too absorbed in his work to realize the subtle stiffness of his tone or the fact that he had completely ignored the issue of Haruhi. "Are you… researching about…?" He didn't bother finishing the sentence, trying to sound hesitant and hurt.

"Attempting to in any case."

"Have you found anything?" He asked meekly, injecting just the right amount of fragile hope.

Kyouya sighed and pushed up his glasses, still not focusing on Id. "I've gathered a list of delusions, syndromes, or mental illnesses, that are associated with trauma to the temporal lobe, but none have yet to stick out as definite matches."

"I see…" Id replied quietly, already growing weary of the innocent act. _Let's try a different flavor of mindfuck for a while._ "It's so hard not being able to do anything for him… I just don't know what to do with myself anymore…"

Kyouya's hands paused for only a mere moment. "That's understandable, but you can rest assured that seeing as his delusion concerns yourself, you will be involved in its treatment.

Id kept silent just long enough for Kyouya's head to raise questioningly, almost sauntering towards him, making no attempt to hide the subtle sway of his hips, and drawing out each syllable with an breezy sort of sensuality.

"You know senpai… I _very_ emotionally distraught right now… and seeing as we're such …_good_ friends…"

With a light hand, Id slowly slid the laptop closed, trailing his fingers up the other man's chest and neck to caress his cheek. Kyouya remained stone-faced, even as lips and breath tickled his ear as Id whispered.

"…maybe you could… _comfort_ me…?"

Kyouya's eyebrow rose only barely as Id drew away, smirking wickedly, and leaned closer, closer, closer—

—and yelped as Kyouya's firm hand gripped his hair, pulling him back and away from the other boy's face.

"I don't think Hikaru would appreciate that proposition, though you are no doubt only doing it to spite him, isn't that right Id?" Kyouya asked coolly.

Id did his best to look hurt and appalled, but a twisted smirk and only vaguely psychotic laughter soon surfaced.

"Tch. You're good. Too good. I've gotten too used to dealing with idiots I guess!" He said with all the glee of a child on Christmas morning. "I know it's obvious now, but what gave me away? Was I too forward? Or have my acting skills just gotten rusty?"

Kyouya sighed lightly, setting aside his laptop and weaving his hands together on his lap in a way that screamed _I'm looking down on you_. "I'm sure you're well aware that… well for simplicity's sake lets just say Kaoru… is quite the romantic. Yes?"

Id sneered. "Pitifully so."

"Which is to say that given that he has someone he cherishes in a romantic sense, he would sooner pine away until his dying breath than look elsewhere for affection or comfort."

"Tch, not if _I_ had anything to say about it… but yes, most likely…" Id stiffened suddenly. "...ah, so you figured it out, huh? Though admittedly they were doing a pretty half-assed job of trying to keep it under wraps…"

Kyouya brushed off the subject. "So what brings you here exactly? I'm somehow hard pressed to believe that you came in search of comforting. I suppose the more important question would be why you're here at _all. _Kaoru was lying about his state of mind perhaps?"

"Hah! Not quite _Kyou-chan. _He's chasing the delusion that some how _that guy_ can solve this whole situation. I'm just making sure he gets there within the century, and I figure that gives me the right to get a few kicks along the way."

Kyouya barely suppressed his flinch at the nickname. "'_That guy_'? You mean Hikaru?"

"Sorry _Kyou-chan_ that's a _secret_. But to answer question you really wanted to ask, yes he has a plan, hair-brained as it may be."

He didn't acknowledge or deny Id's accusation, instead opting see just how much Id was willing to talk. "And you're okay with that?"

Id huffed, crossing his arms in a distinctly annoyed manner. "Tch. That retard is beyond helping. Both of them are actually. I figure I'll just get my jabs in where I can and hope for the best. Fighting it takes too much effort." Id continued to grumble under his breath. Kyouya swore he heard a '_Resentment and all' my ass_ but decided not to question it. He opened his mouth to try to continue analyzing Id, but was interrupted by an exaggerated yawn from behind the other boy.

"Oh! Looks like I fell asleep again! Why didn't you wake me up Kyouya…?" Tamaki trailed off looking back and forth between Id and Kyouya. "Kaoru what are you doing up? Did something happen?"

From where Tamaki was sitting, he couldn't see the malicious grin that spread over Id's face.

"Aw… That's too bad, _Kyou-chan_. It looks like we've been interrupted." He said lustily, letting his hand drift across Kyouya's chest as he circled his chair, dipping his head down to run his tongue over his ear.

"We'll just have to continue some _other_ time, now won't we?"

Tamaki's chair screeched and tumble over noisily as he shot up, looking torn between rage and embarrassment. "KAORU! Y-You unscrupulous devil! How dare you disrespect your mother like that!?"

Id stood up, blinking in confusion. "Mother? …Ah right, your little familial delusion. One big, happy, incestuous family and all that." He strode over to where Tamaki stood incensed, cutting off anything he might have tried to say with a sharp tug on his collar, pulling his face down until they stood eye to eye. "Tch, you foolish king, I'll have pity on you and give you a little hint, eh? You've probably heard the saying before… '_He who chases two rabbits catches neither_'? Do yourself a favor and mull that over for a bit."

Having said that, Id patted him on the cheek condescendingly, turning and strolling towards the door leisurely.

Tamaki blinked dumbly, eyes trailing after Id's hand as he walked away, completely dumbfounded by the boy's words before he noticed something.

"Kaoru… Wait, what happened to your hand?"

Id paused already half-way out the door, raising the hand in question. "Oh, you mean this?" He said with mock innocence, indicating the slightly bleeding bite mark on his finger. He looked back at the two with a scheming smirk. "Let's just say I had a little run in with a rather feisty little raccoon."

Id's laughter filled the room, resounding through the hall even as he shut the door.

Tamaki rubbed the back of his neck, thoroughly perplexed. "What was up with Kaoru? And what was up with that… that…"

"I do believe he was making fun of you."

He blushed indignantly. "I figured out that much. _You_ looked pretty unbothered though."

"Being bothered by it would have only encouraged him. More importantly, that wasn't Kaoru."

"WHAT!? How is Hikaru out of bed!?"

"He isn't. That was Id."

"Id? As in—!?"

"Precisely."

Tamaki paused. "You can tell?"

"No, but he confirmed it himself, so I'm inclined to believe it."

"Then why are we just sitting here!? He's probably going after Hikaru!"

"That's the plan." Tamaki shot him a disbelieving look. "Kaoru has an idea apparently."

"It's rather uncharacteristic of you to trust him about that."

"I'm inclined to think that Id actually talking to him will have some effect, regardless of Kaoru's reasons, but whether or not it's good is yet to be seen. But that aside, aren't you even the slightest bit concerned about the _raccoon_ comment?"

"Yes actually. Shame on you Kyouya! I thought you had better sense than to keep raccoons in a hospital! Animals can be therapeutic and all, but raccoons could have rabies! Something like a dog would have been better! I could have lent you Antoinette—!"

"Tamaki, there are no animals in this hospital, raccoons or otherwise."

"Then what the was he talking about?"

A tense silence settled as they contemplated.

_The idea of there being a raccoon in one of our hospitals is ridiculous, it would have been exterminated long ago, so that means—_

—_he was probably referring to something else. But that was definitely a bite mark, so something living. Maybe a person? The only person that comes to mind when I think of a raccoon is—!_

The realization dawned on them simultaneously.

"HARUHI!!"

-oOo-

**AN:** Egad! It's a miracle! I still live! Salutations and apologizes, as it has once again been a while. Some of you probably hate my guts for bringing Id back, but he's fun to write, what can I say? Plus he has a purpose. (Probably) Sorry if this chapter (or anything I write) makes no sense. I swear to god I'm going to be the mentally deranged one by the time I finish this monster.

Another huge thank you to (a. everyone who is reading, (b. anyone who reviewed/favorited/what-have-you, (c. anyone who has stuck by me despite the excruciatingly long silent periods.

On another note, I foresee one more chapter and an epilogue of sorts. Don't hold your breath as per usual.

Also brace for twincest (as in HikaruxKaoru / incest between twin brothers / whatever you want to call it), because ultimately I am a fan. I've tried to keep it pretty understated thus far, so this is your warning. Nothing M-rated of course, but it will be pretty prominent. If you think that will offend you, I highly suggest you discontinue your readership and I thank you for you patronage thus far.

That being said, I hope you enjoyed! ^^


	4. Part IV: Therapy

Hikaru was feeling considerably more coherent.

Either a nurse had come in while he was sleeping and adjusted the amount of drugs being pumped into his body intravenously or they had so drastically overdosed him that he was already developing a resistance. Regardless he was feeling better.

Sort of.

He could actually feel his extremities now and was acutely aware that his head and arm hurt like a _bitch_, but now instead of being unable to hold on to one train of thought for more than thirty seconds at a time, he was over-analyzing things, unable to stop himself from worrying about what he was going to do about Id.

He couldn't understand it. He supposed Id being back made some sense taking head trauma and stress into account, but what he really didn't get was why he could _tell_. As much as he hated to admit it, he had never been able to tell Kaoru and an acting Id apart. There was nothing to tell them apart _with_. Physically they were identical, not even with the minute discrepancies between Kaoru and himself, and to be frank, Id was capable of a flawless impersonation of Kaoru when he wasn't trying to mess with his head.

Maybe he was going for a more drawn out form of torment? Poison him slowly over time and only reveal himself at Hikaru's dying breath. Or maybe he'd just keep pretending to be Kaoru, to torment him with the fact that no one else would ever believe him and that he'd never have the brother he knew back. Or maybe he was coming to kill him right now, and would be knocking at the door any second now with one of those emergency fire hatchets, or some equally gruesome tool, in hand.

He stared at the door expectantly for a few seconds.

Nothing happened.

He sighed and clenched his fist around the cast on his left forearm, trying to ignore the minute itch that he wouldn't be able to scratch for another eight weeks.

He flinched when the door opened without warning and, with an achy protest from his neck, looked over sharply just in time to see Id jamming the door shut with one of the visitor's chairs.

Noting his conspiratorial grin and distinct lack potentially life threatening implements, Hikaru did his best to crush the fleeting swell of fear in his chest.

"Why Hikaru! You're looking wonderful!" Id says cheerfully. "In fact the only way you'd look better is if you were a cold, lifeless corpse!"

"You flatter me _Id_." Hikaru replies sharply. "Finally decided to fess up?"

"Sure. After all there's no fooling _your_ immeasurable brilliance." He bit back with a derisive laugh.

Hikaru gave him a wary look. He wasn't supposed to _agree_ with him. "So what? Are you here to strangle me? Poison me? Flaunt the fact that you've taken away the most precious thing to me _again_?"

Id's expression twisted halfway between a self-assured smirk and a snarl.

"How cruel, talking to me so coldly _big brother_." He growled. "What happened to wanting your brother back _resentment and all_?"

Hikaru gritted his teeth. _Damn Id for being so good at twisting words_. "The key word there was _all_, not just the single-minded hatred."

"Tch. I knew it. You never really accepted me at all."

"No." Hikaru said with uncharacteristically growing clarity. "I do. But just because I accept you as part of my brother doesn't mean I have to like you."

Id's posture softened. "That's rather selfish logic, don't you think?"

"Maybe, but since when have you given a flying fuck what I think of you anyways?"

"I don't." Id replied maybe a little too quickly. "But if I can convince Kaoru that you don't really care about him for what he really is, then maybe he'll finally give up on you."

"That would be a lie and we both know it." Hikaru says darkly. "I love Kaoru more than anything." A bit of red crept onto his cheeks, but there was no hesitation in the statement.

"Denial is a wonderful thing you know? It can make you believe _anything_. _You_ should be fairly familiar with the concept." Id didn't give Hikaru a chance to talk back. "Besides, you only love _that guy_ and his spineless, sickening adoration."

Id shuddered abruptly, slouching over and hiding his face from view.

"But…" He started again after a pause, in a soft quiet tone that didn't suit Id at all. "But that's okay…. because you deserve it!" He says looking up at Hikaru with bright, unadulterated devotion in his eyes. "Because I love you more than anything too!"

Hikaru stared at him with a wide eyed, perplexed expression. "…wait …What?"

He leaned forward, taking Hikaru's hand gingerly in to his own and cradling it against his cheek affectionately. "Oh you have no idea how much I've missed you Hikaru! It's so painful not being able to be with you. This separation is just—" He paused, letting his hand fall from his grip, a look of profound melancholy overtaking him and eyes glittering with unshed tears. He stood and walked to the window, gazing out with his hands clenched at this chest. "It's probably for the better… These feelings of mine are so disgusting, so immoral, so _wrong_ and yet so so _right_!" He turned back towards Hikaru, tears falling unashamedly. "I don't deserve you at all, do I Hikaru?"

Hikaru stared dumbly. _What in god's name is going on? _This wasn't like Id at _all_. He wasn't sure if even Id could act this well. It was all so mind-numbingly… _melodramatic_. And adorable in a way he supposed, and kind of comforting, but at the same time entirely too much so. Like that sick feeling you get when you eat too much of your favorite ice cream.

_This can't be Id_. His mind concluded finally. _There's just no way_. _But at the same time, that is __**not**__ Kaoru. _

"Who are you?" Spilled from his mouth without thinking.

The other boy looked momentarily taken aback, but smiled bashfully at him, suddenly not resembling Id at all. If anything he made Hikaru think of the first time he had kissed him, in a last ditch effort to regain his brother. _That hadn't been Kaoru?_

"Well I'm not really Kaoru, the ego, and we already have an Id, I guess that would make me the Super-Ego huh?" He giggles playfully, all previous despair forgotten. "But that's quite the mouthful, isn't it? Why don't we just go with _S.E_.?"

"S-Sure?" Hikaru said blankly, not quite sure how he felt about his brother _giggling_. "So you aren't actually Kaoru…"

S.E. worried the sleeve of the hospital pajamas, looking distraught. "No." He murmured in a small voice, before looking up at Hikaru forlornly. "Do you still love me?"

God how he wanted to say yes and wipe that hurt look off his brother's face.

"No." Is what ended up coming out, and despite the look of utter dejection S.E. gave him, he refused to take it back. "Granted I can already tell I like you a lot more than Id and I maybe I could love you in a friendly or strictly fraternal way, but you just aren't Kaoru. …I'm sorry."

The hurt settled into a blank expression.

"Then if neither of us are Kaoru, who is he?"

Hikaru wished more than anything that he knew the answer. He thought back to after Id disappeared and before all this drama started, to the years that nurtured brotherly affection into something much, much stronger, and the weeks before the accident that removed all doubts.

"He's like both of you." Hikaru said finally, and the blank look he was getting seemed unimpressed. He stared down his hands, clenching at the sheets uselessly and letting his eyelids fall closed, searching.

"He doesn't have Id's smirk or S.E.'s smile, but some mixture of the two, a sort of wry grin… And when laughs, it's carefree and playful, not like a cackle or a giggle really. Adorable in a way, but kind of conniving too. He can be a little dramatic at times, and over think things a lot, but he knows how to laugh at himself, and not take things too seriously. He knows what he wants, but would give it up in a heartbeat if he knew it would make someone he cares about happy. He's just… different. Different from S.E., Id, and anyone else."

Hikaru paused, unable to bring himself to open his eyes look at what should have been his brother.

"He's my brother, my Kaoru… I don't know how else to explain it. I just need him so badly." He murmured brokenly.

"Then…" His brother started softly, taking his hands in his own and guiding them upward to cradle his face. "…take me back Hikaru. _Look_ at me. _See me_. I've been waiting here for you all along." That voice. _Dear god_, that _voice. _He _knew_ that voice.

His eyes snap open, and the sight of Kaoru's breezy, inimitable gaze took his breath away. Not quite getting his brother's name past his tongue, he crushes their mouths together in a way that's notably uncomfortable and awkward, but charged with enough relief and unadulterated joy that neither had the heart to pull away until the could no longer hold their breath.

Hikaru immediately pulled Kaoru into a hug, nuzzling into his neck desperately, ignoring the IV that had been torn from his arm and the panicky shrieking of various machinery, whose sensors had come undone with the movement.

However, to his merit, he at the very least paid attention when the chair that had been jamming the door clattered inward in a broken heap, splintered when the tag team of Hani-sempai and Mori-sempai rammed the door open.

-oOo-

The rest of Kaoru's stay at the hospital was rather uneventful, seeing as the nurses were wary of leaving him and his brother alone in the same room for too long, partially because of the previous incident and partially because whenever they did, a series of unfortunate (but ultimately inconsequential) _accidents_ usually followed. He was released on Tuesday, having stretched out his stay for as long as possible, and back to school on Thursday, being smothered by acquaintances and overzealous fangirls at every turn. Hikaru, sadly, was confined to the hospital until the next weekend, and even then he got two days of bed rest with twice daily visits from a nurse to be safe. (Though that was more motherly than medical in nature.)

The Host Club celebrated his return on Monday with a hospital cosplay, and the girls eagerly devoured the moving tale of how he had sacrificed his own body to protect his brother, playing it up for all it was worth.

That charming normality overtook them again with frightening ease, and by the time Hikaru was deemed in good health, the only remaining vestiges of his injuries were an arm brace and the still mottled scar and slightly too short hair on the base of his neck. And aside from the occasionally too gushy or too sadistic stray thought, he had yet to feel any stirrings from either Id or S.E., and their parent's were back to their respective businesses, and the Host Club was the same as always, and…

…and…

…and they still hadn't talked about it.

Somehow, between doctor's visits and school and life itself, that lingering awkwardness had been shoved aside in the face of far more pressing things. It could wait.

_We'll both still be here tomorrow right?_

It was 2:28 AM and Kaoru roughly shoved his half-asleep and utterly bewildered brother out of bed.

"Hikaru, we need to talk."

_End_

-oOo-

**AN****: **Pffft. Wow, talk about senseless drama. Hope it wasn't too confusing, wordy, boring, incomprehensible, etc. I didn't re-edit this quite as obsessively as I usually do, so there are probably a few more grammatical, structural, whatever errors. Also props to xoxoxlovestinksxoxox for the ending, which was totally inspired by one of her reviews. (Not to mention requesting this sequel to begin with.)

Also, _wow_ I'm like a zombie with the way I keep coming back from the dead on you guys. So props to everyone who made it this far too, particularly to everyone who took the time out of their day to actually review. I hope I didn't disappoint to much. :D

Thanks once again for your readership and support! It's been fun guys. There's a sort of silly little epilogue I added too, just for a bit of clarifications sake. Hope you enjoy it.

PS: Even though no one probably cares, I'll probably start uploading the backlog of other stories I've been writing while working on this, which are primarily for other fandoms. So just in case you're not intrested in anything other than Ouran and/or don't want to get spammed with notifications, _or_ are feeling masochistic enough to read some of my other stuff, I thought I'd mention it.


	5. Epilogue

Kyouya sighed and rubbed his eyes wearily, scanning the contents of the file titled _Hitachiin_.

The words _Complete Recovery_ mocked him cheerfully, and he flipped through numerous pages of nurse reports and scans to a few sheets of immaculately handwritten notes, putting the rest aside.

Hikaru's mystery delusion had never been truly identified, having been "cured" before any need for exhaustive study had been necessary. Deeply unsatisfied with this gap in his knowledge, Kyouya flipped through his notes to a specific section, whose title was neatly bolded and underlined.

_**Capgras Delusion**__- a delusion usually found in conjunction to injury in the temporal lobe. Affected party holds the belief that one or more persons close to them have been replaced with an identical imposter._ _The delusion is believed to stem from an impairment of the subject's ability to summon the proper emotional response to a familiar face despite conscious recognition, hence the idea that said familiar person is an "imposter."_

It had been one of his prime suspicions at the time, though the idea would have had to be twisted slightly to suit Hikaru's case. While most people sustaining such a delusion would have no other explanation for someone who looked right but _felt_ like an imposter, Hikaru had Kaoru's _Id_ persona, which logically, or as logically as a one could get with mental illness, would have looked identical to Kaoru but still not have seemed right.

_But that's just silly_. He has to remind himself. Occam was probably rolling in his grave. Freud too, if you took Kaoru's side of the equation into account.

He replaced the notes and snapped the file shut deftly, tucking it into the back of his filing cabinet where he'd hopefully never see it again.

Maybe he should call Tamaki.

If nothing else, his friend was good at being ridiculously distracting. (Even when he wasn't around apparently, considering the looks the he still got from the entirety of the female faculty at the hospital whenever he had business there.)

He glanced back at the file cabinet irritably.

Yes, he definitely needed the distraction.

-oOo-

**AN: **So there you have it. My BS explination for what exactly was going on with Hikaru's head in this fic. Don't worry, Kyouya think's it's silly too. _I_ think it's silly too, but it was a fun plot bunny while it lasted. Also if you have any question's concerning what was going on with _Kaoru's_ head... so do I, but leave me a review and I'll do the best I can to clarify. XD


End file.
